Bizarre Questions – Part Two

It’s now the turn of my lady followers, of which there are many.  They don’t seem to converse with female escorts on the same level that they chat to me.  They like my recipe ideas, they seem to like my open nature and they are genuinely fascinated but they also ask some bizarre questions at times.

I am always amazed why these ladies would follow me, some even live very very nearby to my home.  I was just chatting to a follower a few nights ago about electric cars and she’s only six miles away in Low Fell, just south of the city centre.  That amused me.  So what bizarre things do my lady folks ask me ……

Are The Clients Gay – No they’re not, 95% of the men that I see are married, some of whom didn’t have an opportunity to be in a relationship with another man because of the era they were born in, social and work pressures or their fear of coming out to their family.  Some are genuinely bisexual, some are just greedy.  One thing is for sure, none of them would ever leave their partners / wife under any circumstances.  Some get to 40 and want to experience sex with another bloke.

I Worry About Your Safety – Yes, my female followers come out with this quite a lot.  I am quite sensible.  I insist that every new client phones me (regulars can just text), I don’t take appointments from certain members of the community, nor drunks or men who sound off their nut on cocaine.  I won’t accept an appointment with a gentleman with little or no English as it’s too difficult and they can never understand or find my home.

How Do You Fit Everything In – I sometimes wonder that myself, so it’s not really a bizarre question.  I hold down a full time job but I do have an employee who works for me 10-15 hours a week helping with book keeping.  I am awake at 6am every morning and can still be seeing clients at midnight.  I have a strict work ethic and no one has ever handed me anything on a plate.  I have to work for everything I have.

It Must Be Hard Having A Relationship Then – Nope, I am married …. to a man, he knows and he’s not around a lot of the time.  He’s my best friend and he supported me immensely during my very bad illness last year, when I nearly died.  He’s Scots and splits his time between Edinburgh and Newcastle, at my convenience.  I also go on holiday with him 2-3 times a year.  We’ve known each other for 23 years.

Are The Men All Camp – Nope, my standard daytime clients are retired guys,  travelling reps, Mr White Van Man.  I see heating engineers, builders, delivery men, taxi drivers, chauffeurs even a bloke who works in a local bank on the counter taking your money who has a 8″ butt plug stuck up his arse all day whilst he serves you.  Bet that one opened your eyes.  I heard you gasp !!!  My evening crowd are executives in hotels, guys on stag trips at weekends and when Newcastle are playing away, I am chockablock because they all say to you “their wife” …. I am just popping down the pub to watch the match.  You’re never going to suspect that he might be giving me a good shafting before he gets there or after the match.  Away Games become Gay Games.  I used to see a guy who works for a very famous bread company who used to deliver around the corner at my local shops.  He could park the van there and do their delivery to the shop at lunch time and walk over to mine, quick fumble and and off because the GPS wouldn’t show him deviating off his route – TRUE STORY.

Do They Prefer Your Blow Jobs Then – Well let’s put it this way, most come back again and again and again and again and again.   Did you know that most clients who visit a gay male or female escort mention the lack of oral sex at home as their main reason for visiting someone like me.  It’s the top reason.  The second most important reason with a gay escort is anal sex.  Straight men are obsessed with it, mainly because of porn.

My Husband Would Never Book A Gay Escort – Hmmm, you reckon.  The men I see are people you’d never expect to book a gay male escort.  They’re VERY married and someone like me saves more marriages that I could ever spoil.  I keep your home life happy.  I am the person you know nothing about who will never email, text or call him.  It’s purely a financial arrangement.

Bet You’ve Seen Famous People – I have yes.  I see a very well known actor, who visits me whenever he’s up this way filming.  A little funny story I always tell clients is a guy that I seen one Thursday about 6 or 7 years ago and he was staying in Newcastle overnight.  He booked to see me at 2pm and ran late, he needed to get the train to Darlington at 5pm so he was about to cancel. I said no, come in a taxi as planned and I will take you to the mainline station for 5pm. I dropped him at the station and he gave me a £20 tip for my trouble.  That night, I put Question Time on at 10.45pm and he was on the panel !!!!!!!!

No Kids, No Commitments, So What Do You Spend Your Money On – My lady followers ask me this a lot.  Well for there just being me most of the week, a dog and three cats, I spend in excess of £100 a week on shopping for us.  I like nice things, I like lovely food and I treat my cats and my little dog like royalty.  I also go on luxury holidays to nice places, I have a posh car, a very very posh house in a nice area. I like a nice bottle of wine every night when I think the clients may be finished for the evening.  I also know that I have a shelf life so I will shag as many men as I possibly can before I retire and when I do retire I will have made enough money to be comfortable for the rest of my life.  I did that, just me.  I made it happen.

You’ve Been Around 18 Years – Are You Not Sick Of It – No, I used to be the fuck about the bed escort, then I became the Gentleman Escort (that I am now).  I am no longer skinny.  I have a rugby belly, beard and I am very masculine. I have tried to lose a few pounds and when I did, my regulars didn’t like it.  So I stay at around 15 stone which is perfect for me as I am big lad.   In a few years I will re-invent myself and become a Daddy type escort.  I will stop escorting when the phone stops ringing.  I can easily work as an escort for another 10 years.  I am busier in 2019 then I was in 2009 but I am good at marketing myself and staying grounded.  The money the men pay me doesn’t go up my nose and I am 100% reliable.  I never let people down unless it’s totally unavoidable (like ending up in hospital last year).

£100 Is A Lot Of Money That Comes Out Of A Family Household Budget – It is yes but I am worth every penny, I am not cheap and your husband is paying for total discretion, someone who publishes their HIV results and who will never contact him.  Guys are in cycles ….. once a fortnight, once a month, once a quarter, once a year.  I have about 30 clients in a once every six month cycle, they visit twice a year and they fit in around a guy I see once a fortnight.  So his sanity might only cost your household income £200 a year.  I see about 4 new clients every week, 2 or 3 of them will come back but it might not be for 3 years.  A lot of my clients don’t even live in the area.  Living so close to the A1 is a godsend for work

So there you have it – the questions the ladies ask

Hope you enjoyed it.

Steve x

 

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